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Lard

Lard is yummy !
Very good !
Sometimes it is hard as wood.
Sometimes it is soft as clay.
I want lard every day.

Lard is soft and very squishy.
Sometimes it is rough and bushy.
Lard is sometimes soft as cheese.
Lard is always fun to squeeze.

Lard is like a blob of fat.
If you drop it then it won't splat.
But, the main reason that I have lard.
Is because losing it is very hard.

A Cow

I am a cow and I say moo.
Grass is what I like to chew.
I like food and lots of chow.
That is what makes me a cow.

I eat lots and lots of food.
Then I belch 'cause I am rude.
I am a dumb cow I don't know a lot.
When I sneeze then I blow snot.
When I have to plop I don't use a pot.

That is what makes me a cow.

1,000,000 Tons of turkey

My Mama bought a huge turkey
that weighed a million tons.
We tried to cook that turkey,
but it would not get done.

So we dragged it to a space station.
And sent it up to the sun.
Suddenly the rocket exploded!
Hot turkey for everyone!

Boogers and allergies

C'mon folks blow your nose!
Watch out everyone there it goes!
Big boogers, small boogers, booger cram!
Come and eat some booger jam!

It's winter!Got allergies?
Now don't be afraid to hack and wheeze!
Sneeze and choke out all your guts!
Oh look right there you ate some nuts!

Fall

Apples hanging overhead.
One fell on me and I was dead!
Went to the hospital and recreated I.
And now I am a Franken guy!

A Turkey Story

A hunter shot me in the head.
I fell over 'cause I was dead.
They slit me open and what did they see?
Lots of turkey guts in me!